The wife was all dressed as a pedal bin for the fancy dress party when it was cancelled at the last minute...
Boy did she flip her lid!
My wife asked if she could have a little peace and quiet while she cooked dinner…
So I took the battery out of the smoke alarm!
I took my suit to the cleaners, who wanted to charge me £15. Instead I gave my suit to the charity shop next door. They cleaned and pressed it, and put it in the window.
I bought it for £4.50!
I had eczema, diarrhoea and haemorrhoids over the weekend...
My best game of Scrabble ever!
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